My husband didn't find out that he was add/adhd until a year ago, at age 51. We've been married 24 years now, and the damage that has been done over the course of so many years is overwhelming. We are now trying to communicate in ways like you've suggested here. My husband is now on Concerta and is in therapy, we've just started couple's counseling, and I am getting my own therapist now. (we are in a new location)
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The ADHD Effect on Marriage was listed in Huff Post as a top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
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