Recent forum posts (all topics)

My wife (non-adhd) and I (adhd) agreed to use verbal cues, but she feels like she uses them and I don't pick up on them. I feel like we don't really use them, even though we agreed to. So I perhaps I am too distracted when she uses verbal cues. As an example, say "you're doing the thing you do; stop doing the thing you do" is the verbal cue, she believes she says this, I don't feel like hear this and therefore don't stop. Granted I think we will try to come up with some better cues, but I'm wondering:

1. Is there something stronger than a mere verbal cue? 

Let me start by saying my partner and I are currently in a co-parent relationship. Have been separated but living together for a year. Been together 8 years, never married.

I was just diagnosed as an adult age 40, was originally diagnosed at age 6 but never knew..

Hi,

   I have a constant struggle with my husband about making plans and honoring them. 1. He doesn't really listen when we talk. 2. When I do our evening check in, he doesn't tell me he has any plans for tomorrow, and he says yes to what I propose. 3. The next morning he announces he has to do this, that or another thing, and it's urgent and can't be postponed. 4. We re-negotiate our plan for the day, usually with some frustration and hard feelings.

My husband and  I have been together for 20 years. We have been married for 5 1/2 years. I have always known he has had issues due to extreme childhood abuse. There's no question in my mind he suffers from ADHD in addition to history. He sees a therapist of his own. I see mine and occasionally we both see his.  My therapist beloved very strongly he has adhd and his therapist is dealing with the trauma. He is not being treated for ADHD cannot take medication. I am constantly the one in charge of everything. I have lists, reminders and basically take care of everything.

Hey everyone. I'm so glad I found this forum, because I've been trying so hard to find the support I'm not getting from my partner. 
I've been with my wife (they/them) for about 6 years. Married just a little over a year ago. I am a 30 year old woman diagnosed with ADHD about 6 months ago. 
We've always had turmoil in our relationship, but being diagnosed gave me great insight to why I do what I do... or don't do. 

Every single time I locked myself in the bedroom, through tears of sadness and anger, my Google searches have led me here. Every time, I found kindred spirits in all the women dealing with ADHD husbands, and there was some solace in knowing I was not alone. Then, as every other time before, he would make a bid for connection, and I would accept.

My husband and I have been together for almost 10 yers, married for 8, and have a 3.5 year old son (who i am convinced has ADHD-H like his uncle)

I have discovered there is nothing more lonely than having a spouse who doesn't acknowledge your pain. 

Married 26 years next month. 

Was visiting our home town last week and on Saturday I get up to use the restroom as old men do. I remember putting my hand on the wall and recall the texture. The next thing I remember is being on all fours and staring at the hem of her pajama pants. Apparently I passed out. Fell and hit the toilet and bruised several ribs pretty good and banged my elbow on something. 

I’m so hopelessly and painfully stuck. I have given in to every demand of my husband, the latest being not talking about the issues we are facing…and as I predicted it has only caused more distance and resentment between us. He refuses to do anything to connect with me, calling every hug, every kiss, every kind word, every action “forced”, and if I don’t initiate those things I am “impossible to please”. I can’t win. There is no compromise. There is zero account for my feelings.

Hi everyone,

I was diagnosed with ADHD a few weeks ago, but I'm yet to be treated. I'm 32.

My life has been filled with turbulent relationships, particularly romantic relationships.