Recent forum posts (all topics)

hey all, my spouse (recently dx ADHD last year) is really struggling and I find myself getting more and more frustrated with him. He has anxiety, depression (the chronic, hardcore kind) and ADHD. His brain spins out all day, every day. He's addicted to his devices. He doesn't exercise and he doesn't eat right and he doesn't look after himself. Most days I can't believe that his body allows him to function.   Every day for our house is ruled by his emotions and feelings and whichever of his challenges wants to rear its head that particular day.

I feel so ashamed, i am crying. My son is brilliant, fantastic, clever, ambitious......and a ball of energy i need to handle in the right way. Im exhausted, im running on empty. 

Inbetween a full-time career, solo parenting 4/5days of the week and remembering everything, i cant cope. Im full of anxiety and back on medication. 

I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year we're both in our late 40s. The potential for undiagnosed ADHD came to a head about six months ago. He went from "no one has every said I have ADHD" to listening to the book and really relating to it. So we're out of denial, which is good but nothing much else has changed. Where it is really hard for me is in terms of plans- he regularly breaks plans we have together- usually because he has double booked himself or just completely forgotten altogether.

Am so exhausted. Have been spending a week's vacation doing only things for children. It's been joyful, and I'm so happy spending time with them. But oh so tired now.

My ADD ex husband has had very low energy for years. I notice now in my week I've squeezed in several weeks' worth of child activities, hosting their friends, researching and preparing new activities, in order to compensate for the passivity I suspect will await the children in his house.

Many of us get caught up in overthinking and over analyzing our spouse's lives...The product of this is destructive (stress, anxiety, depression) to our own mental, emotional and physical health...After reading here for many years and being subjected to my wife's lived out life 16 years, I have realized the pressure and reality of not being able to get to a place that is healthy, a place of sharing and trust has left it's mark on me....Over thinking, Over analyzing, it can start new everyday if we are not careful...I feel like all the work (acceptance, boundaries, refusing egg shells, my ow

So, my marriage has been suffering a very slow and painful death for many years. We've been together 13 years and only the first year was good because he was love bombing the hell out of me. We have been falling apart totally for about 5 or 6 years now. My husband has - in my unprofessional diagnosis - PTSD (from a traumatized family background), ADHD (disorganized, mess, lack of attention), RSD (severe, raging, irrational), and probably also a good dose of NPD (constantly talking about himself, needing ego strokes to feel okay).

Just went grocery shopping where I used to go before divorce. Realized as I moved the shopping cart forward how things have changed.

I don't care anymore if people crowd me in the aisle. I don't mind if a stranger approaches with a question, even if they're a bit intrusive and not polite. I used to be so high-strung with stress, I couldn't stand other people who were even slightly disrespectful or dominated the physical space. Not that I'd say anything, I'd just feel hurt. I'd swear at other drivers in my car. I'd shake off charities in the street with a frown. 

I'm a James Clear Atomic Habits fan (to a degree, let's face it, some of these people who preach habits and stuff seem to come across as having never encountered or lived with an ADHD-er or any other neurodiversity in my HUMBLE opinion :) :) ) and i got his newsletter quote today and wanted to share for all of you as I found it really profound. It doesn't make me want to make massive changes or go and give my partner 10x new podcasts to listen to or whatever, but it did make me pause, think and consider and gave me some hope. I hope it does the same for you all. 

My husband and I have been married for well over twenty years.  From the very beginning of the marriage, the only thing he has ever done in any real way is earn a paycheck.  If I asked him to do anything, it was because I actually could not do it.  We have multiple children with adhd, too, and he did not help with any of their care.  I remember with our final baby, I was desperately needing some help, and when I asked point blank for him to commit to helping with the baby in the evenings, he became very angry and refused.