Dark, Silent Box

ADHD & Marriage News - May 30, 2024

Quote of the Week

“Your brain is trapped inside a dark, silent box called your skull and it is receiving signals from (all over) your body…these inform your brain of changes in the world. But your brain doesn’t know the causes, it only knows the signals themselves…your brain has to guess at the meaning and causes of those signals. Even when your brain guesses wrong, those guesses become your experiences. So, context is incredibly important in understanding our experiences.”

- Lisa Feldman Barrett

I was blown away when I heard this brain expert talking about how the brain predictively creates our perception of our experiences as it pieces together why it is probably getting the signals it is getting.

This is so backwards from the idea that I’m used to - that our environment creates our experiences – that I had to really stop and think. But, though it’s a new idea to me, it does make sense. And supports the idea that context means a great deal.

Context is part of the power of learning about ADHD. As one example, learning that an ADHD partner’s distraction doesn’t equal “I don’t love you” but rather “I am distracted (symptom).”

The predictive nature of our brain’s interpretations (which turns out to be an evolutionary, energy-saving feature of the human brain, according to Barrett) can slow healing and change, though. With the brain basing its experiences on past knowledge, it can take a while for partners to stop being nervous about what ‘might’ happen. In the past, the initial signals in a sequence may have meant something specific (‘you are unloved’). Now it doesn’t need to.

One way to retrain your brain to interpret things in new ways is with the power of thinking ‘intentionally’ about changing your perceptions and moving into your new future. Now that you have more accurate context, you can train yourself and your brain to more positively experience the signals you are receiving.

Phew! Is this an interesting, new way to think about the brain for you, too?

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