Recent forum posts (all topics)

Does anyone know of a good Facebook group for ADHD spouses and/or parents? My wife joined one that was exclusive to the non-ADHD partner which turned out to be mostly a lot of wives venting.

I thought it might be helpful to find a Facebook group for ADHD partners and was surprised to see a bunch of groups for non-ADHD and nothing for the ADHD partner.

Maybe you can suggest something? Hoping especially for something proactive and supportive.

Thanks!

My wife wanted to go to an outdoor birthday party at a paint your own pottery place.  She asked if I would be OK with that and I said yes.

Just before going to bed, I noticed that she posted photos from the party on Facebook--including one of her without a mask right next to the person celebrating her birthday.  The other woman was wearing a mask. 

She pushed back at first about how "It was only one time" and "It was only for a minute" before eventually admitting that she had been irresponsible and endangered our whole family.

Is there a good way, a helpful way, to respond to my husband's twisted recall of events?
 

For example, one day he brought up a job from years ago, and then he says, "I only took that job because you were on board."  Except that we had plenty of heated discussions where I repeatedly made it clear that the salary would not be enough and the hours would be difficult.  But now, years removed, he genuinely believes that we were both on board, that we both wanted it.  

It's funny, I haven't been on this forum for 5 years, but when I look back on the one post I made five years ago, I probably could have written a slightly altered version today.

Hi all! This is my first post here. I'm in the midst of reading THE COUPLES GUIDE TO THRIVING WITH ADHD and almost every page relates to my relationship. It's been a long road of difficulty for me and my husband - been together for 18 years, married for 11 with 2 kids. My husband was diagnosed with ADHD about 17 years ago and has been on meds since. He also has depression anxiety, substance abuse issues and more. 
 

After 38 years of marriage I still struggle with understanding some of the behaviours. One of them is the daily contempt and disgust my DH has for me yet he still expects the perks of marriage. He cannot understand why I no longer want to spend much time with him. He goes from screaming at me to asking me to go out to dinner with him. Never any apologies or explanation for the blow ups. Just carry on as if nothing happened. Does he just forget that he treated me terribly? I cannot just swng along with him with his moods. It's crazymaking.....

Our 11 year old daughter has been previously diagnosed with ADHD and OCD.  There is a long history of conflict with her mother.  Other issues have manifested themselves lately, such as writing all over her bedroom walls.  She has become obsessed with a story about Joseph Stalin killing people by putting them in boxes with insects.  She has had increasing panic attacks, including ones that lead her to freeze up and go mute.  One time, she started swatting herself and said that she thought that there were bugs all over her.

Our 14 year old dog has recently had stomach problems and the vet gave her several pills, including one that was to be given only once a day in the morning.  I gave her one on Wednesday morning.

This week I am online learning by myself about emotional intelligence and maturity.  MINE!  It seems to me that when I was young, I had a youthful emotional maturity.  I stood on solid ground. After living with H all these years, I see that I have bent myself to accommodate him and his ways and I had become emotionally immature too and a little crazy.  I brought myself down to his level to not seem to act "superior or motherly or stodgy or 'better than' ".  In other words, I was putting myself on his level. I tried fighting fire with fire.