Recent forum posts (all topics)

My wife is going for an evaluation in a few weeks to determine (it's obvious) if she has Adhd.   She clearly does.  I've begun reading all the information I can get my hands on about the subject and I want to be supportive but the more I read I get bitter and more frustrated about how this has impacted my life!  We've been together 20 years.  I've done so much to keep our household going over the years.  Working 60 hour weeks, running children everywhere, doing household chores that I don't have time to do while my wife has done so little and has never held a real job.   

I am struggling with how best to respond to my husband's instant defensiveness if he feels he's being criticized. He's medicated but I don't feel the meds help much with his emotional outbursts and getting defensive about the smallest things. I've started peri menopause so I'm more moody myself and I do everything I can to treat it and utilize healthy coping/self care. My husband takes meds but doesn't practice much else in terms of self care. He claims he doesn't have time. This frustrates me but I've given up bugging him about it.

I recently came across this website and am currently reading ADHD effect on Marriage. I am grateful for these resources and this is my first post on here. I am the non-ADHD spouse and I have suffered immensely as a result of my wife's ADHD symptoms. She has also recently been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder and I believe she take meds to address both conditions.

My girlfriend and I both have adhd but hers is much more severe. 

She always diagnoses everyone as adhd despite knowing very little about them, even sometimes just hearing someone talk about a person she feels she has enough information to diagnose them. It causes conflict when I sometimes dismiss her "diagnosis" as there is no way she could possibly have attained enough information about a person to make such a call.

Does anyone else find their partner seeing ADHD in everyone and assuming his/her diagnosis is unchallengable ?

After a mutual agreement in May 2022 that my husband would no longer take household funds to support his business, he told me yesterday that he needs another $10,000 due to unforeseen circumstances. I said "no" and chaos ensued. I asked why he thought it was appropriate to take household funds despite our previous agreement -- he insists that since it is unforeseen circumstances that he should not have to beg for money that is "his" and that I should see his point and agree.

Hello!

Its been 5 years of marriage and the past 2 years of sweeping "issues" under the rug have left me with a pile of dirt under a smelly rug....hmmm

Anyone relate? Anyone coping? How... How do I cope with a marriage I have no idea how to cope with? 

Hey all,

I will start out saying my wife and I have been married going on 5 years and we have been together for over 6 with being good friends for 5 years before that. We have a beautiful almost 3 year old daughter and another child on the way. My wife is one of the most hardworking people I know and put other people needs before her own. I love my wife to death but as of lately I feel like I have completely have failed her and my family.

My wife (non-adhd) and I (adhd) agreed to use verbal cues, but she feels like she uses them and I don't pick up on them. I feel like we don't really use them, even though we agreed to. So I perhaps I am too distracted when she uses verbal cues. As an example, say "you're doing the thing you do; stop doing the thing you do" is the verbal cue, she believes she says this, I don't feel like hear this and therefore don't stop. Granted I think we will try to come up with some better cues, but I'm wondering:

1. Is there something stronger than a mere verbal cue? 

Let me start by saying my partner and I are currently in a co-parent relationship. Have been separated but living together for a year. Been together 8 years, never married.

I was just diagnosed as an adult age 40, was originally diagnosed at age 6 but never knew..