Yesterday, my SO and I were driving to a doctor's appointment she had, and I was tagging along. They had just chip sealed the road we live on, and the surface is now uniformly resurfaced with fresh gravel. It has the look of a new carpet to give you an idea. Only a few moments as we were driving down the street, she looked at me and said this:
"Remember last year when they put asphalt on all the cracks in the street....and it looked like snakes all scattered randomly all over the road? That really bothered me....it looked all chaotic and ugly. ( Paraphrasing )
That was pretty close to what she said if not quoted exactly. She continued on and said this:
"That's why I have the house the way I do. I really can't stand it when there's things out on the counters, or like my art room with all the paint bottles crammed in there like they are. That drives me crazy ( quote )"
In other words, she gets a visceral, uncomfortable feeling when things are visually out of place, not spaced out in a certain way or just bad fung shei: crowded, or unorganized.
It never would have occurred to me about the tar stripes on the road bothering her of anyone? ( the snakes ) It's not even something I really even notice or look at? And it certainly doesn't cause me to have a visceral reaction? I simply don't even notice.
This explains to me many things. For example: It explained why, the other day when I got home from a long day at work and it was 103° outside, she was being very insistent that I go out and clean up some trimmings in the yard from some shrubs she had cut earlier in the day.
My internal dialogue went something like: are you nuts?? It's 103° frick'in degrees outside!! What I said to her was actually something like: I'm mowing the yard tomorrow morning early before the heat comes up, can't it wait until then? I couldn't understand her sense of urgency and why it was so important to get a few trimmings off the lawn?
Now I understand. If she presented it to me the way she did yesterday, it would have saved me a lot of stress trying to understand her logic or reasoning in why she does things the way she does? There really is none is the answer. It's based more on a feeling than anything else. That part I understand and can relate with.
This helps me as a guide, in knowing what and why I need do things around the house.....and even the order in which I do things.
The longer I wait to do certain things....for her, the more she has to endure this uncomfortable feeling.
I get that. It's something I can understand.
J
PS: I think this may also have something to do with how she approaches me at times. She can be pretty bossy, with that sense of urgency again...like, I need this right now! And without knowing any better, the first thing question that comes to mind is....why right now?
